Until I was about 25 years old, I was the skinniest kid in town. Around that age, I got a desk job and wasn’t running around tables in restaurants anymore, and I started to snack more, too. Then I started having children, and well, life happens. It’s not easy to maintain perfect slenderness even in the best of circumstances. But I was (and am) healthy and happy and because I was thin for the first half of my life, in my mind, I’m the same, even though on an intellectual level I know I’m not that svelte 25-year-old woman anymore. Gaining weight was enlightening to me because there were things about being a “fat girl” that I had never known about before.
Thin privilege is a real thing. Having been both thin and fat, I can attest to the fact. I’ve seen it in action. To many people, fat girls are invisible. That may or may not be OK with some women, but I sort of enjoy the anonymity that being a non-hottie gives me. I was much less confident and self-assured when I was thin, for some strange reason. As a chubby chick, I feel freer, and I know that doesn’t make a lot of sense, but it’s true. With that said, there are times when fat girls aren’t invisible and that’s when we become aware of thin privilege. For example, the experience of trying on swimsuits or wedding dresses is different for heavy women than it is for thin women.
And when it comes to any activity that’s body-conscious, such as going to the beach or the gym, people do notice overweight people. That’s exactly what happened to a woman named Kynadi Hadley when she decided to start eating healthily and going to the gym. Excited to be getting her health on track, she was going to the gym every day after work. After a while, she began to notice that the same three women were there together anytime she was there. Then one day she saw something that horrified her. The women were taking photos of her and snickering at her behind her back. Below, you can read her story, which was posted on Reddit.
I’m the fat girl.
This is my first week at the gym and every night after work, the same three girls are there. Today I found out they have been snap chatting pictures of me and making fun of me, but I don’t mind.
I’m glad that you haven’t gone through what I’ve been through. I use to be in shape, I broke my hip and had to give up all exercise. Then my grandma got sick and I took care of her full time, I couldn’t leave her alone because I had no help, so I gained more weight. Then she died, and I ate my feelings and gained more weight. Now I’m a size 22. I don’t hate myself, or my body. I love who I am, and that took me my entire life to be able to honestly say those words. I love myself.
It really sucks that society, and your parents raised you that it was okay to try to hurt someone that’s trying to better themselves instead of trying to lift them up but I’m not mad. Thank you for reminding me to keep pushing after I had a really long day. In a month when the new year shit has worn off, I’m still going to be dieting and working my ass off at the gym everyday. It’s not so you, or anyone else, will except me. It’s for me.
I hope anyone else, who feels ugly or is over weight and has decided to make a life change will keep going.
Forget the skinny girls who laugh at you, or the muscly men that tell you you’re gross, love yourself.
Let’s teach love, today’s world needs it❤
After posting this heartbreaking story, Kynadi’s experience went viral and she was able to use her brief flash of fame to shed light on a serious topic and an issue faced by all women. She has been overwhelmed at the amount of support she’s gotten and has even started getting letters from people all over the world.
— Kynadi Hadley (@kynadihadley) January 13, 2017
Kynadi hasn’t stopped her own personal question to live a happier, healthy life. Her message is this: ignore the haters. Do what’s best for you and for the people who love you. Keep working and keep striving to be stronger.